Das Leben ist zu kurz für schlechte Laune...
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Golfen...A group of men live and die for their Saturday morning golf game. One transferred to another city and they're lost without him. A new woman joins their Club. When she hears the guys talking about
their golf round, she says, "I played on my college's golf team. I was
pretty good. Mind if I join you next week? " No one wants to say 'yes', but they're on the spot. Finally, one man
says, "Okay, but we start at 6:30 am." He figures the early tee-time will discourage her. The woman says this may be a problem, and asks if she can be up to 15
minutes late. They roll their eyes, but say, "Okay." She's there at 6:30 am sharp, and beats all of them with an
eye-opening 2-under-par round. She's fun and pleasant, and the guys are impressed. They congratulate
her and invite her back the next week. She smiles, and says, "I'll be
there at 6:30 or 6:45." The next week she again shows up at 6:30 sharp. Only this time, she
plays left-handed. The three guys are incredulous as she still beats them with an
even-par round, despite playing with her off-hand. They're totally amazed. They can't figure her out. She's very pleasant
and a gracious winner. They invite her back again, but each man harbors a burning desire to
beat her. The third week, she's 15 minutes late, which irritates the guys. This
week she plays right-handed, and narrowly beats all three of them. The men grumble that her late arrival is petty gamesmanship on her
part. However, she's so charming and complimentary of their strong
play, they can't hold a grudge. This woman is a riddle no one can figure out. They have a couple of
beers in the Clubhouse, and finally, one of the men asks her, "How do
you decide if you're going to golf right-handed or left-handed?" The lady blushes, and grins. "When my Dad taught me to play golf, I
learned I was ambidextrous," she replies. "I like to switch back and
forth. "When I got married after college, I discovered my husband
always sleeps in the nude. From then on, I developed a silly habit.
Right before I leave in the morning for golf practice, I pull the
covers off him. If his pecker points to the right, I golf right-handed;
if it points to the left, I golf left-handed." The guys think this is hysterical. Astonished at this bizarre information, one of the guys says, "What if
it's pointing straight up?" She says, "Then, I'm fifteen minutes late."
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Das Leben ist zu kurz für schlechte Laune...
Zwei Deutsche in London...
A: Hello, Sir! How goes it you?
B: Oh, thank you for the afterquestion.
A: Are you already long here?
B: No, first a pair days. I'm not out London.
A: Thunderweather, that overrushes me, you see not so out.
B: That can yes beforecome. But now what other: my hairs stood to mountains as I the traffic saw. So much cars gives it here.
A: You are heavy on the woodway if you believe that in London horsedroveworks go.
B: Will we now drink a beer? My throat is outdried. But look, there is a guesthouse, let us there man go!
A: That is a good idea. Equal goes it loose, I will only my shoeband close.
B: Here we are. Make me please the door open.
A: But there is a beforehangingcastle, the economy is to. How sorry! Then I will go back to the hotel, it is already retard. On againsee!
B: Oh, yes, I will too go. I must become my draught to Bristol. Auf Wiedersehen!
A: Nanu, sie sind Deutscher?
B: Ja, sie auch? Das wundert mich aber. Ihr Englisch ist so hervorragend, dass ich es gar nicht bemerkt habe…
Gruß,
Twincam
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Seid nett zu Euren Kindern, denn sie suchen Euer Pflegeheim aus...
My dear mister singing club...!
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Der Direktor einer großen Bank geht in den Ruhestand und arbeitet seinen Nachfolger ein.
„ Was ist denn von der Sekretärin zu halten?" fragt der neue den scheidenden.
„ Na wissen Sie“, erwidert dieser, "als Fachkraft ist sie eine Pflaume, aber als Pflaume eine Fachkraft!"
Der etwas andere Brutkasten:
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Seitdem ich die Menschen kenne, liebe ich die Tiere.
Lieber stehend sterben als kniend leben.
#1 Rule of old age: don't lay it down, put it where it BELONGS.
#2 Rule: IF you put it WHERE YOU WONT FORGET, you WILL forget where it is.
Ohne Worte 
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Trust The Universe
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LET'S MAKE CHOPPERS GREAT AGAIN!
Spaß muss sein!
chai
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Nicht Nachgeben - Nachladen.
OK
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Nicht Nachgeben - Nachladen.
..... ich kann die Tusse echt nicht mehr sehen.....
.
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Seitdem ich die Menschen kenne, liebe ich die Tiere.
Lieber stehend sterben als kniend leben.
#1 Rule of old age: don't lay it down, put it where it BELONGS.
#2 Rule: IF you put it WHERE YOU WONT FORGET, you WILL forget where it is.
.
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Es grüßt
Rouven
E-Mail-Adresse rouven@rarebag.de
WWW.rarebag.de
https://www.facebook.com/rarebag
Ein Blinder und ein Lahmer treffen sich.
„Wenn du mich auf die Schulter nimmst, könntest du mir die Beine ersetzen und ich dir die Augen“, meint der Lahme.
Der Blinde geht darauf ein und trägt den Lahmen, der ihm den Weg durch die Stadt sagt.
Plötzlich sagt der Blinde: „Das ist aber eine heiße Frau dort drüben!“
„Woher willst du denn das wissen?“, fragt der Lahme, „Du kannst doch überhaupt nichts sehen!“
Da erwidert der Blinde: „Aber ich kann es im Genick spüren!“
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Seitdem ich die Menschen kenne, liebe ich die Tiere.
Lieber stehend sterben als kniend leben.
#1 Rule of old age: don't lay it down, put it where it BELONGS.
#2 Rule: IF you put it WHERE YOU WONT FORGET, you WILL forget where it is.
heute im flyer entdeckt , glaube morgen fahr ich hin und hol mir son teil
mal schauen welches material das dann ist 
brauch noch ne lampe für meinen darkroom im keller
